Sunday, June 3, 2012

i can see you're trying to hide all the darkness in your mind



this is the video that plays on repeat in the anne frank house.

i was listening to otto frank's video, and he says that in anne's diary he met an entirely new version of his daughter, someone much more serious and self-critical than the girl he had known. and i thought, if there's one thing about me that's completely true, it's how transparent i have become. if you read through my journal, it would, for the most part, be like reading through my blog, like talking to me in person, like looking at a picture of me. (except for the fact that i haven't written in my journal for months of course and really haven't taken many pictures either.) i wear my thoughts, dreams, and ideas like a second skin for everyone to see. all my words were born from them, my lips know how to speak nothing else. all my lies are truths and everything just exposes me further. they live in my eyes, in the palm of my hand, on the soles of my feet. i can't run from them, as much as i'd like to sometimes. i can't hide them or cast them away. they are the seasoning of every joke and the stowaways in every story. that is not to say that everyone, or even most people, really know me. but if they don't, it's just because they weren't looking.

i wasn't always like this, and i'm not always sure if it's the best way to be, but it's pretty much who i am now and you know, i think i'm okay with that.

(random side note: the song quoted in the title is awesome and has great lyrics and i love it and you should listen to it because you might too.)

*Long Island Blues - Julian Casablancas

2 comments:

  1. anonymous hippopotamusJune 5, 2012 at 9:16 AM

    someone commented on the video that julian is the dylan of his generation. and i kinda agree he reminded me a lot of bob dylan. and i think i've always been a heart on your sleeve type person...and i know sometimes i should just keep stuff to myself..but at the same time its better not keeping stuff inside.

    ReplyDelete
  2. hmm... i dunno if i'd agree with that. i can see where they're coming from in that song, and i guess a few others would work too, but if i had too choose a dylan of this generation i'd have to say that the tallest man on earth fit the bill better.

    ReplyDelete