Once upon a time, not too long ago, there was a retired teacher who was poor, but who had a beautiful daughter. One day, he had to speak to the banker who was threatening to take the teacher's house if he couldn't make his payments. The teacher begged and begged for more time to come up with the money, but the banker was known throughout the land to be a greedy man and wouldn't listen to his pleas. In desperation, the teacher said, "If you will give me more time I will introduce you to my daughter. She is beautiful."
The banker laughed and said, "What good can beauty do for me? And what good could your daughter do?"
The teacher, noticing an iPod still in its box on the banker's desk said, "She can fill that iPod up with music without touching any of your money."
The baker said, "That is a talent that I could use. If your daughter is as clever as you say, bring her here tomorrow, and I will put her to the test."
The next day, when the teacher's daughter was brought to the banker, he took her into his office in which stood only a computer and his iPod and said, "This is all you'll need. Now get to work, and if by tomorrow morning you have not filled my iPod up with music for free, your father will lose his house." He then locked the girl in his office and went home.
The teacher's daughter had no idea how to fill the iPod with songs for free and started to cry. Just then, the computer flared to life, and a mechanical voice said, "Good evening, teacher's daughter. Why are you crying?"
The teacher's daughter said, "I have to fill this iPod with music for free or the banker will take away my father's house."
The computer laughed and said, "Why, that's easy. Just download this program and you'll get all the music you want, absolutely free." Without a minute to lose the teacher's daughter sat down to download the program. After quickly checking "I agree to the terms and conditions," she was able to download music for free.
The next morning, the banker came back. When he saw his iPod full of music and his bank account full of money, he was astonished. But being a greedy man, he could only think of what else he did not have. He locked the teacher's daughter in his office again and commanded her to get him all of his favorite movies for free. "If I come tomorrow and you do not have the movies, your father will lose his house."
As soon as the banker left, the teacher's daughter started to cry, for who could get so many movies for free? The computer flared to life again and said, "Don't cry, teacher's daughter. Just download this program and you'll get all the movies you want, absolutely free." The girl quickly downloaded the program, checked that she agreed to the terms and conditions, and got all the movies the banker wanted for free.
When the banker came the next day, he was delighted to see all of his favorite movies with the teacher's daughter and not a penny missing from his money. "Tonight, you must get me all of this software for free. If you do, your father will never lose his house, and I will marry you. You may just be a poor teacher's daughter, but you have already saved me a fortune."
The banker locked the teacher's daughter in his office again and left. As soon as he was gone, she began to cry. "Music and movies are one thing, but it is impossible to get such expensive software for free!"
The computer came alive again and said, "If you agree to these terms and conditions, I will give you all the software you want for free."
"I agree to anything you want. Just give me this software without using any of the banker's money."
When the banker came the next morning and found all the software he wanted, he married the teacher's daughter and let her father keep his house with no further payments.
After her wedding, the teacher's daughter decided to go back to her old job at the diner. Her old boss, though, stopped her at the door. "You can't work here anymore," he said. He showed her that one of the terms she had agreed to to download the free music was never working again. "That's okay," said the teacher's daughter. "My husband is rich enough that I don't need to work. The free music was worth this." A few days later, when she was leaving to go to the store, she noticed her car was missing. Where she usually kept her keys was a paper listing the terms she had agreed to to get the free movies, one of which was giving up her car. "That's okay," the teacher's daughter said to herself. "My husband has a car, and I can walk to the store. The free movies were worth this."
A year later, the teacher's daughter had a beautiful baby boy. She adored her baby and spent all her waking hours doting on the child. When the boy was one year old, the teacher's daughter woke to find him missing from his crib. On his pillow were the terms and conditions she had agreed to to get the free software. Highlighted were the words, "I agree to give up my first born child." The teacher's daughter was horrified and ran to the computer crying. "I'll give you all my money," she pleaded with the computer. "What good can your money do for me? I get whatever I want for free. Something alive and beautiful is much more valuable." No matter how much she cried and begged, no matter what she offered the computer in exchange for her son, the computer would not give back her child. And she never saw him again.
***
I got a little lazy at the end lol. Anyway, modern day Rumpelstiltskin, also known as: me not writing my paper. Oh, the extent i go to to procrastinate. Moral of the story: read the terms and conditions that you have probably never even looked at. You may be signing off your first born child.
*Kings in Castles - Michael Tolcher
The banker laughed and said, "What good can beauty do for me? And what good could your daughter do?"
The teacher, noticing an iPod still in its box on the banker's desk said, "She can fill that iPod up with music without touching any of your money."
The baker said, "That is a talent that I could use. If your daughter is as clever as you say, bring her here tomorrow, and I will put her to the test."
The next day, when the teacher's daughter was brought to the banker, he took her into his office in which stood only a computer and his iPod and said, "This is all you'll need. Now get to work, and if by tomorrow morning you have not filled my iPod up with music for free, your father will lose his house." He then locked the girl in his office and went home.
The teacher's daughter had no idea how to fill the iPod with songs for free and started to cry. Just then, the computer flared to life, and a mechanical voice said, "Good evening, teacher's daughter. Why are you crying?"
The teacher's daughter said, "I have to fill this iPod with music for free or the banker will take away my father's house."
The computer laughed and said, "Why, that's easy. Just download this program and you'll get all the music you want, absolutely free." Without a minute to lose the teacher's daughter sat down to download the program. After quickly checking "I agree to the terms and conditions," she was able to download music for free.
The next morning, the banker came back. When he saw his iPod full of music and his bank account full of money, he was astonished. But being a greedy man, he could only think of what else he did not have. He locked the teacher's daughter in his office again and commanded her to get him all of his favorite movies for free. "If I come tomorrow and you do not have the movies, your father will lose his house."
As soon as the banker left, the teacher's daughter started to cry, for who could get so many movies for free? The computer flared to life again and said, "Don't cry, teacher's daughter. Just download this program and you'll get all the movies you want, absolutely free." The girl quickly downloaded the program, checked that she agreed to the terms and conditions, and got all the movies the banker wanted for free.
When the banker came the next day, he was delighted to see all of his favorite movies with the teacher's daughter and not a penny missing from his money. "Tonight, you must get me all of this software for free. If you do, your father will never lose his house, and I will marry you. You may just be a poor teacher's daughter, but you have already saved me a fortune."
The banker locked the teacher's daughter in his office again and left. As soon as he was gone, she began to cry. "Music and movies are one thing, but it is impossible to get such expensive software for free!"
The computer came alive again and said, "If you agree to these terms and conditions, I will give you all the software you want for free."
"I agree to anything you want. Just give me this software without using any of the banker's money."
When the banker came the next morning and found all the software he wanted, he married the teacher's daughter and let her father keep his house with no further payments.
After her wedding, the teacher's daughter decided to go back to her old job at the diner. Her old boss, though, stopped her at the door. "You can't work here anymore," he said. He showed her that one of the terms she had agreed to to download the free music was never working again. "That's okay," said the teacher's daughter. "My husband is rich enough that I don't need to work. The free music was worth this." A few days later, when she was leaving to go to the store, she noticed her car was missing. Where she usually kept her keys was a paper listing the terms she had agreed to to get the free movies, one of which was giving up her car. "That's okay," the teacher's daughter said to herself. "My husband has a car, and I can walk to the store. The free movies were worth this."
A year later, the teacher's daughter had a beautiful baby boy. She adored her baby and spent all her waking hours doting on the child. When the boy was one year old, the teacher's daughter woke to find him missing from his crib. On his pillow were the terms and conditions she had agreed to to get the free software. Highlighted were the words, "I agree to give up my first born child." The teacher's daughter was horrified and ran to the computer crying. "I'll give you all my money," she pleaded with the computer. "What good can your money do for me? I get whatever I want for free. Something alive and beautiful is much more valuable." No matter how much she cried and begged, no matter what she offered the computer in exchange for her son, the computer would not give back her child. And she never saw him again.
***
I got a little lazy at the end lol. Anyway, modern day Rumpelstiltskin, also known as: me not writing my paper. Oh, the extent i go to to procrastinate. Moral of the story: read the terms and conditions that you have probably never even looked at. You may be signing off your first born child.
*Kings in Castles - Michael Tolcher
But tis true... who knows what we are agreeing to any more?? no one reads the terms and conditions... they just accept them without a thought for the consequences
ReplyDeleteLOVE IT! but the beginning sounds like Ali wrote it... :\
ReplyDeleteon a random note...omar is DRIVING ME INSANE!!! he has been awake for 3 hours .. its 3 am.. he woke up hamza once (but i got him back to sleep) and he wont go to frwaking sleep!
omg i wanna throw him through a window...or maybe against a wall...
ReplyDeletelol i'm going to have CPS tracking me down if anyone reads this and doesn't know me.
but he won't go to sleep...and then if i put him down he won't stop crying. i fed him, multiple times..i changed him also multiple times even when his diaper was dry. I'M going freaking insane! please god let this boy freaking sleep!
Hannah... in one of my classes during undergrad, my professor told us a story about this company (i can't for the life of me remember the name) that used opensource software in their business without reading the terms and conditions. apparently one of the terms was that if any profit was made, the programmers would get a certain percent of it. they went to court and the company ended up paying a substantial amount to the programmers... and then stopped using the software. now, whenever i download anything, i think of that story. (though i still rarely the conditions. they're just so long.)
ReplyDeleteanonymous hippopotamus... in the beginning i was following the style of the original fairy tale exactly. it got annoying, though, so as i went on i just tried to stay kinda similar. i guess ali writes like a grimm.
also, u55 that sucks :/ is he too young for cold medicine? (note: i do not condone gratuitous drug use.) at least hamza went back to sleep, though. and it's the night before hisham starts, right? super sucks. the kid probably has belated jet lag or something.