Tuesday, May 1, 2012

all we need is some relief through these hard times

since my last post where i was able to spend an entire afternoon making book spine poetry, a lot has changed. for one thing, projects that were supposed to be due on the sixteenth were suddenly moved up to the second. exams were suddenly made cumulative. and group members were suddenly called out of town on business trips. basically, school decided that i had too much under control, that i wasn't panicking enough and that, sadist that it is, it had grown to like my panic in the beginning of the semester and wasn't ready to be deprived of it just yet. so it threw a whole lot of stress on me and watched me squirm. joke's on it, though, because i have everything back under control and this means that i will just have less to do in the upcoming weeks. (except for that cumulative exam. i'm really not looking forward to that.)

but school wasn't the only thing to decide that things were going too well for me. i mentioned on here that my dad was over in the desert. what i didn't mention is that he was there because my grandmother was sick. after a couple of days when everyone thought she was getting better, she passed away on wednesday (i'm not going to get into a sob-fest about it here, though). a wednesday that i still had to go to school. that was fun. and then, a couple of days after that, i found out that my ap physics teacher from high school died. which you may not think is too big of a thing for me considering the fact that i graduated high school six years ago and really haven't had much contact with him since, but my high school was really small. and everyone was really close. and a death in the faculty is kind of like a death in the family to us. (remember when i talked about the death of our ap history teacher?)

anyway, between the deaths and the stress i was not having a very good week. though aside from a really bad thursday where i was sleep deprived and bursting into tears about everything, i was doing a pretty awesome job at coping. which was why i was avoiding blogging. because writing it all out would make it real, and i just could not afford to do that at the moment. but, like i said, everything is back in hand, my dad will be coming back on thursday which should help his mood a bit (or at least distract him? maybe?), and i received an email yesterday morning that made my day. all i have to do now is make it through the next couple of weeks, and at the moment, it seems very possible.

*These Hard Times - Matchbox 20

12 comments:

  1. I am sorry you have been having such a hard time lately! Chin up, and try to enjoy the small wonderful things of life.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. that's the plan for now :). thanks for stopping by!

      Delete
  2. anonymous hippopotamusMay 1, 2012 at 8:02 PM

    all that and you still helped me out and watched moori both wednesday and thursday. thank you sooo much!!! and glad things have calmed down...btw i love this style post...it reminds me of your older ones.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ew i don't like "moori." choose a different nickname. but yeah babysitting is on.

      also, what's different about this style compared to my recent posts? i'm honestly curious 'cause i kept thinking there was a difference but couldn't pinpoint it.

      Delete
  3. anonymous hippopotamusMay 1, 2012 at 8:03 PM

    oh and r you ok with watching moori this wednesday and thursday too??

    ReplyDelete
  4. Lots of huggles hun. Hope things start to look up for you soon

    ReplyDelete
  5. anonymous hippopotamusMay 2, 2012 at 7:56 AM

    hmm...i dunno if i can explain the difference...but there definitely is a difference. I guess more description and detail (which i love). i feel like your more recent posts have been rushed, or lists, or just not as you. i guess i like these posts more than the posts from the 30 days because those felt like reading someone's writing assignment for english class rather than something this person was interested in writing about.
    i guess the word i'm looking for is honest?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. interesting. i can see that.

      Delete
    2. I agree... This feels more like -you-

      I feel like the same on my own blog - the challenges don't feel like me... and the draft posts are piling up...

      I never used to use the save as draft function before now >.>

      Delete
  6. omg i have so many drafts saved. a lot of them are written in some sort of code that i apparently forgot to teach myself so i have no idea what i had wanted to write (sometimes i just draft ideas that i want to get to when i have the time) but still can't bring myself to delete them.

    i'm excited, though, because i feel like i've been forcing myself to write recently and maybe this return of my old voice means that i finally forced my way through my writer's block.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Writer's block pisses me off sooooo much

    ReplyDelete